In recent years, a new term has surfaced that seems to be at the heart of a societal debate: toxic masculinity. At first glance, the term might suggest that there’s something inherently wrong with being a man. But when you dig deeper, it becomes clear that this conversation is about something much more complex.

The Masculine Epidemic: A Crisis?

In our discussion, we touched on what I like to call the Masculine Epidemic. Men today are facing a crisis of identity. While there’s been a significant push against toxic masculinity, simultaneously, we’re witnessing the suppression of traditional male traits. Men are being told that their natural behaviors—whether it’s showing leadership, strength, or even simply expressing interest in women—are problematic.

This raises a key question: If men are supposedly becoming “more feminine,” as society encourages, why are we seeing an increase in the narrative of toxic masculinity? 🤔

Is this all part of a bigger conspiracy to suppress masculinity entirely, leading us toward a world where gender differences are blurred? While that might sound extreme, it’s a valid concern when you look at how masculinity is portrayed today. The media, movements, and social commentary often paint men in a negative light, regardless of the context.

A Baffling Suppression of Men

The eradication of masculine traits is truly baffling. When did this start? Why are we seeing such a strong push to vilify men simply for being themselves? As someone who’s been in the strength and conditioning world for 22 years, this shift is particularly evident. The strength world is traditionally male-dominated, full of camaraderie, banter, and yes, jokes that may seem crude to outsiders.

Let’s be real—jokes are jokes, right? But now, more than ever, men are cautious about how they speak and interact with others. Harmless comments that were once laughed off are now considered dangerous territory. Of course, sexual harassment is a serious issue, and it should never be downplayed. But there’s a significant difference between making a light-hearted comment and crossing that line.

Impact on Male Behavior and Colleagues

In my world, many male colleagues have become terrified to even hug or compliment a woman. Think about that. We’ve gotten to a point where men are afraid to say something as simple as, “I like your shirt,” for fear of being labeled inappropriate. 🫤

I’ve asked several of my colleagues outright: Are you scared to interact with women in your industry? Every single one of them said yes. And that’s alarming. Men are being paralyzed by the fear of saying the wrong thing or being perceived in the wrong way. This fear has exploded into what some might call a hyper-feminist movement, where men are constantly walking on eggshells.

As a father of a young boy, this terrifies me. Am I raising my son in a world where his natural attraction to women could be vilified? Where he’ll be told that even showing interest is wrong? And what happens when boys are taught to suppress their natural behaviors?

Suppressing Natural Behaviors Leads to Darkness

When young men are told their feelings or attractions are wrong, it doesn’t just disappear—it festers. Suppressing natural behavior can lead to darker, more destructive outcomes. And I’m not just talking about toxicity; I’m talking about really horrific things that come from the suppression of one’s true self.

Boys need to be taught how to express their feelings properly, not be told their natural inclinations are inherently wrong.

Conclusion: Are We Losing Masculinity?

Ultimately, if we continue down this path, where do we end up? If men are being told to suppress their masculinity, where does that leave the next generation? Will boys be discouraged from expressing strength, leadership, and even love? And if so, what happens to society as a whole?

The solution lies in balance. We don’t need to suppress masculinity to elevate femininity. Both can coexist, and in doing so, we create a healthier, more understanding society. It’s time to rethink how we approach this conversation and ensure we aren’t raising boys to feel ashamed of who they are.